Bedside Rumors

So I was having an innocent chat with a pal who suddenly asks me ‘so who is doing you now?’. Thinking it was just an innocent swali, I tell him that there is nobody to talk about at present. He pushes the story further to ask me whose beds I have passed through to date. After my kawaida LOL posts, he goes ‘and dont lie coz I know everyone on that list’. After telling him that the number on that list should be 1 and only 1 (not 1 multiplied by 100 divided by 2,JUST 1), he tells me that I am pathetic in bed and that these fellaz on his ‘list of shame’ have confirmed it.

My issue is not that there were dudes shortbus enuff to claim I had taken an overnight whiff of their sheets, but the fact that they went ahead to rate my imaginary dismal performance. So do dudes do this coz we kataad them ama coz we dont feel them or what? someone throw me a bone here, because based on the people that me and this ‘curious’ pal of mine know are actuallyreally good friends of mine, this means that they are nooooooo real friends of mine after all (to think that I shared sacred Jose Cuervo sessions with these new age fools! I feel violated, man). So after you have lied to the masses like that, what do you think will happen? that I will play some bedminton with you in order to buy your silence on a lie that people seem to believe? Hell no!!!!I’m just going to wade and relax in the pool of satisfaction knowing that there were fellaz wishing me out there enough to lie about it….call me,you sons of bitches!!!!we have beef to settle! πŸ˜›

 

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Published by: shikutip

Mummy to Amaliah, pretty decent creative, I am the current cloud pointing champ and an undeniable lover of my fam, my friends, my rugby and my sanity (although I let that one get away)...

Categories Uncategorized8 Comments

8 thoughts on “Bedside Rumors”

  1. Hey, when they fantasize about u…fantasize about them too and rate them too and let them know. Go like, “OK, yeah, I laid him and he was not man enough for that. I wasted my time” Lol!! Just be careful-they hate that and might as well kill you.

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  2. kazi ni mkate na beer, hawaangali maasilahi ya jamii, hata the last time walisema not single was ages [never] ago. afadhali gay anamsimamo, PS shore cannot ever underperform

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